Look what I got....

So on Tuesday afternoon I recieved this.... What an amazing dad I have!

Haircut

I got my haircut today (thank YOU JJ :) here is the new look. I also had Jenn (thank YOU :) take a few pictures because I wanted to give my dad a picture and a gift certificate to his favorite store. These are the 2 I printed out, but have not decided which one to give him. What do you think?

My CRAZY 4th of July

Yes it say's 1:00 in the MORNING We have FINALLY arrived back to the Lightfoot home This is what I looked at for almost 3 hours! CRAZINESS! SO last night I joined the Lightfoot family, and a few other singles from church to go down to Downtown Disney for fireworks. Um, wrong idea (even though it was a memory I will never forget :) We spent 45 minutes (probably longer) just trying to FIND a parking spot. It's bumper to bumper in the parking lot, some people who don't even know how to direct traffic are, people going the wrong crazy-CRAZINESS! We finally see some people stand in parking spots, to save them-that is when we send out Michael & Andrew Henderson, and Daniel to go find a spot and off the went. After many turns and trying to get to another parking lot we found a spot. It was a fun night, hot, lots of wonderful memories, see the fire works all few minutes of it and we are off to the car. SO we get to our car at little before a 11. Not one car is moving. Then the clock says 11:38. We start laughing, being silly, driving each other crazy (mind you I have the Henderson boys, Daniel and Jenn all in the car :) 11:45. We haven't moved AT ALL! Horns are honking, people are staring, some drivers are nice. Everyone in the car except for me finally decides to join Tyler, Tiffany, Stephanie and Jon at McDonalds ALL the way on the other end of downtown disney because they were bored (sometime after midnight :) I stay in the car so if the cars move we can too. As you can see in the picture it is now 1:00 in the morning. That means I have been sitting in this car for 2 STINKING HOURS! I was ready to SCREAM or run over someone ;) Around 1:45 I manage to get us out close to the exit, the crew hops in, and then somehow Jenn and I need to trade spots so she can drive home. So we finally come to a spot where we jump out and trade only to hear people honking their horns at us. We arrive back at the Lightfoot residence at 2:16, and then I FINALLY made it home around 2:45 and was asleep a few minutes later (after I got every disgusting germ off my body :) I LOVED last night, but I hated it too. It was one never to be forgotten and that ladies and gentleman was my CRAZY 4th of July!

Bowling

SO yes I am doing the bowling league at church and LOVING it. Though so far I have missed 3 weeks, and only played 2. But tonight I bowled my highest game. I got a 139. Yahoo! I almost had my first turkey which is when you get 3 strikes in a row but I missed it by 1 pin :( My average has usually been in the low 100s but tonight my average was 119. I am on a very fun team, and the guys keep me laughing. I am by far the worst bowler on our team but thats ok I am still enjoying it.

Press on

Tonight was simply beautiful. I had a few conversations with my dad today on a reoccuring topic that always seems to end up in an argument and me in tears, followed with reoccuring anger & saddnes. He wants me to do something that I am now seeing as HUGE sin (thank you God for your conviction) and struggle with what is yet to come when I stand up for what I believe in. I went to singles tonight, not knowing how it was going to go after my day, and it seems like I have been in a valley, trying to climb a mountain that only seems to be getting higher. But tonight God kindly, and simply whispered in my ears PRESS ON. As I was listening to the message Mike gave tonight (it was AMAZING) on Imitating Christ, and reading out of Philippians 3:3-17 I found myself really taking in each thing he was saying. Here is a glimpse of what God put on my heart. "Press on Kathy, even when you don't understand, feel forgotten, alone, and are living a life that is nomalist. PRESS ON! When depression, anger, anxiety, bitterness settle in-PRESS ON! When you don't want to read the Bible anymore-DO IT ANYWAY." I know, I know your thinking "don't want to read your Bible? or "living a life that is a nomalist?" It's sad that I have a lack and desire and passion to not read His word. I am working on that and God has given SO much grace in this. It's funny (in some sense) that we have been talking about nomalism for 6 months now and I am now just getting it, but I don't think I would have grasped it until now. Its like part of the scales that have been on my eyes, and dread that has been on my heart have been lifted. I pray that I will keep my eyes focused on the goal, and that my life is PRESSING ON, doing the right thing will be an example to my dad and that He will see God's glory through it all. His grace can sustain me. Thank you Lord for your unwavering grace, kindness & love that you continue to lavish on me. Thank you for a piece of HOPE tonight, and for the opportuniy to really engage in worship. If the valleys continue, and this season lingers on I pray that I can have HOPE for the future, that peace will invade my life, fear of man will be wiped away and a true honoring fear of you would over take my heart. May I be broken over my sin, and may conviction be strong in my life. May you be glorified. I really like this song, but tonight after Undivded I found myself continually singing these words and REJOCING that this is my God and King. How beautiful. "The hope of every nation. The joy of every heart. The King who has won salvation. The God who comes for us. All the world must see your love and majesty. THIS IS OUR GOD. THIS IS OUR KING. THIS IS THE ANTHEM OF THE REDEEMED. TELL THE WHOLE WORLD. Sing this to our God. THIS IS OUR KING. The light that broke the darkness. The champion over death. Victorious forever. Your Kingdome never ends." By: New Life Worship

Crys of my heart....

My days seem to be blending together lately, and I feel like more often than not I am constantly in deep thought trying to figure my life out. I wonder if I will find complete peace with God? Will I be free? Will I ever fear God instead of fearing man? What about being truly broken over my sin? Will I make anything of myself? What do I do with my past that seems to STILL be chanied around me? It just keeps going. SO many questions. The one thing that keeps coming to my mind is surrendering. I keep having this reoccuring picture of what surrender means to me. My hands raised with closed fist, and opening my hands to recieve his freedom-Lord please help me to recieve it. I keep coming to this same place where I have 2 choices. The first one I could just go down, but it requires asking for help, and recieving it. BUT NO I am to prideful, self-suffecient and WAY to worried about what other people think and not wanting to burden them to want to take that choice. I choose to carry it all on my own. SO FRUSTRATING. What is it in our hearts that makes us want to not want help (of course except for the fact that we are sinners). At this moment (and I hope that I continue to believe this) but even in all my pride, self-suffecient, anger, jealous, runaway from every problem self that I am. I really am starting to see where he is working in my heart. Humbling me by making me have to raise my hand to ask for prayer AGAIN. I constantly find myself thinking of every excuse in the book of why I don't need to raise my hand-way more worried about what other people think instead of recieving what God wants for me. Or how dear friends have been brave enough to speak truth in my life, even when it has not been easy. Thank you for not holding back. Or for how the past 24 hours my constantly wondering mind has given me some peace. This is not what I thought I would still be walking through years later, but if it takes me 10 more years. I hope that I will grow in many ways. Learning to give my burdens to God, that I will begin to experience or understand the things that I talked about earlier, that I will have no doubt of my salvation and in it all may each and every circumstance teach me to RESPOND the right way, to TRUST Him and to GLORIFY Him. Lord this is the cry of my heart. Help me. Pour out your strength and give me FAITH for what is yet to come. Help me to stay on the steady path, putting one foot in front of the other, ASKING and recieving the help and that leaving, or running away would not be a thought that crossed my mind anymore. Help the lies that are constantly in my heart to stop. May truths overflood my mind and may my HOPE rest in you.

Two PRECIOUS children....

I hope this post makes you smile, when you think about these 2 precious children, and the legacy their mother left them in their short years. I hope that in each picture is a beautiful reminder of their mom and the love that she had for them. Robbie you never ceased to amaze me for how you carried yourself when you first found out about the cancer, how you finished up law school, even with very difficult times going on around you and you continued on serving your family and doing the normal things in life. You were a woman of HOPE, faith and courage. Thank you for your example to me in that. I will miss you. Sometime in April, Elizabeth and I had the idea to take pictures of Lily & Mitchell and then I was going to make a slideshow with the pictures to give to her and then we were going to give her a frame(s) of one of each of the children just to encourage her and give her something to remember when days where hard. Well it never happened, and it is probably a regret that I won't forgive myself for a while. My plan is to later write a letter to both Lily & Mitchell (when I can do it without tears clouding my vision) and to put these pictures on a CD for them to have when they get older, and to give a copy to John. I still wanted to share with everyone these smiles of these beautiful children. It is long, but the last 4 pictures are worth it all! I hope you enjoy!